I like the book The Art of Seduction by Robert Greene because it warns both women and men about people who may be trying to take advantage of them. Greene is also the author of The 48 Laws of Power, which I believe is another must-read for young, ambitious women.
In The Art of Seduction, Greene talks about the various types of “seductive” personalities that you’ll find throughout history. These personalities also exist today, of course. One of those types is the “rake” personality — a man who is an expert at seducing *numerous* women and getting them snared into his trap. I have met this type of guy in the past and can attest to his charm and appeal. The problem is, this guy can never be tamed or nailed down by any one woman.
So here are some characteristics of a male rake. If you want something real and lasting from a relationship, recognize and avoid this type of guy in the future. You may choose to have a fun experience with him, but don’t count on it ever being more than that.
He Loves the Idea of Women
Make no mistake — a male rake absolutely loves women, or rather the IDEA of women. He most likely had a close yet conflicted relationship with his mother as a boy and the other adult women in his life. He most likely learned early on how to grab the attention and hearts of women from his female family members and friends. Young or old, pretty much all women can be caught up in his net if he chooses them as a target and they are unaware of his seduction.
He’s Extremely Charming
A lot of men don’t really understand women and what makes us tick, but the male rake sure does. He knows exactly what to say and when to say it to get your attention. Even if he isn’t the most attractive guy you’ve ever seen, you may find yourself strangely attracted to this person from his personality and charm alone. He doesn’t approach you by saying, “yo yo yo what’s up.” He says “You have such beautiful eyes” or “Why do you look so sad? Are you okay?”
He Has a “Devil May Care” Attitude Toward Life
Rakes are fun. They are exciting and have a “devil may care” attitude when it comes to life. They aren’t really afraid of anything, including death or punishment, which makes them extremely appealing to many women. If someone tells them they’re going to hell, they’ll ask where do they get the ticket. They often drink a lot and abuse substances. They’ll do 100 mph down a highway on New Year’s Eve. The point is that they don’t really care about consequences, and while that is often attractive to women, it is also concerning if you do care about your life and well-being.
He Never Apologizes
One other attribute of a rake is that he never really (genuinely) apologizes for anything. This is because he doesn’t ever think he’s wrong. He could sleep with your sister, cousin and best friend in the same day and get caught each time in the act, but never feels the need to apologize. If pushed to the limit, he may say “I’m sorry” to get his way, but he doesn’t really mean it.
He’s Extremely Persistent
One way that you’ll know you may be dealing with a male rake is that he is extremely persistent and focused on getting your attention. If you say no or ignore him, he will spend the rest of his day trying to figure out how to make you say yes. This may have to do with some type of insecurity and ego problem, or just a scratch that he needs to itch. Most women don’t require much convincing, but the ones who do are a challenge that the rake simply has to conquer. Don’t leave him alone around your things if you’re not interested or you may have a stalker on your hands.
If you want to get a good idea of what a male rake personality is, watch the HBO series Californication. Hank’s character is the ideal personification of this seductive personality. And again, if you want a long-lasting, loving relationship with a man, please understand that you’re not going to find it with a rake.
Lynn Gilliard is the author of a popular relationship guide entitled Let Him Chase YOU. Her latest book Sing While You’re Single offers advice to women who want to remain single for the time being while still maintaining their belief in the power and possibility of love.